it’s easier to stand out as a great husband today than it’s ever been, count yourself extremely lucky to have her as your wife, beauty is more than just outward appearance.

This means she'll be free from worrying about what's happening with the kids, the house, the pets, and you. If we matter infinitely to God, then shouldn’t we also matter to our spouse, to the one who pledged their life with us? As a good wife you make the life of your husband easy and comfortable.

Giving your wife intimacy is about the feeling you create for her, not the physical actions that you do. I would love for you to look into that book and do a series on it!

Rebecca (Gregoire) Lindenbach–youth & college speaking.
It set both of us on a path of a lot of unhealthy habits of conflict avoidance that we are still unraveling.

Your email address will not be published. He hasn’t any friends goes no where just eats and sleeps in a cabin like thing separate from the house. You are “the Dad”. So, what exactly does a wife do that she is so important to her family? And please don’t take this as me minimizing the pain YOU have suffered and the mental and emotional scars it has left you with. He wants them to be confident. What If Your Wife Is the Primary Income Earner? When you make decisions as a father, stand firm in them. This doesn’t just have to be something you do with words… Your actions can communicate how beautiful you find your wife too.

Someone who is not engaging with the marriage does not get the benefits of being married. and having a really nice time, but as often as not that never makes the schedule. In the rotten example you used it was clearly a man hurt because his spouse threatened to leave with his child due to an unfortunate loss of employment.

It is your job to combat that little voice inside your wife that tells her she’s not beautiful. Your words while well intended all reeked of a weak minded, shallow, woman/partner. Shrink said he’s a very lonely person but very smart and has a high IQ. Dad told him go to work, which he did working paper routes, gas station helper, grocery store stock boy and bagger! Whatever the reason, all that "persuasion" your wife has to use to get you to go to the doctor isn't fair to her—she's your lover, not your mother. I truly believe that for most couples having issues, your marriage would fall into one or more of these reasons. Another time I ran into a serious expectation was when my mother was in hospice. Are Expectations in Marriage Wrong? The only way to make your marriage better is to not accept the status quo anymore. But, remember that being present is about more than just physically being around your kids… A father must be present mentally and emotionally too.

In some of the couple friends I know who have split, the husband had such a hierarchical view of marriage that he truly believed that how he saw the marriage was the only valid position.

Having quality time with your wife and kids isn't something that just happens. →, How to Handle Your Children’s Disappointments →, Are Expectations in Marriage Wrong? Nevertheless, there are some spouses who truly don’t seem to care about a spouse’s misery.

I drove her to CO so she could help her best friend when she lost her husband unexpectedly, and I did everything I could to support her and her friend there, to include cleaning the garage, getting his vehicles ready to sell, etc. I also think it’s very wise to not give the benefits of being married to someone who is trying to live single and not work on the marriage relationship. Only God can. Good Luck! Good, strong couples get divorced when they are both at their worst and, exhausted and burnt out, they start blaming the marriage or their spouse for things being so bad. I am very positive on working on me first as you suggested. And a vow is serious! Hope is amazing if you apply it correctly. A better philosophy is that caring for yourself is the path to caring for your family. Always throw good actions, and vibrations, and just accept what life returns back. They show us what’s supposed to be inside our fence. Again, I agree with your sentiment here, and I admire your conviction. Were you taught that having expectations in marriage was bad? 1.

That wasn’t being selifsh. With loads of light and love, Sanjay. A friend is someone who you enjoy spending time with. What expectations do you think are legitimate?

Believe it or not men have needs as well; and one of them is knowing that his woman will stick by his side – during tough times – and most of all if or when money becomes an issue. I do believe that the only person you can change is yourself, and so we need to be focused on changing our own behaviour to better the marriage. We’ve forgotten our duties as the head of the family. If your wife has an extremely stressful day at work, she needs to be able to come home and know that you will care about her day.

It’s not rocket science! If you think of boundaries like a fence, not only do they keep bad things out; they also keep good things in. Do what people As you read through each ‘thing’, I want you to ask yourself, “Does my wife get this from me?”.

And a comfortable and easy–to- live –with- wife is his dream girl.
What makes the couple life sweet and enjoyable? Every wife craves a feeling of security from her husband. Make sure you appreciate the physical, intellectual and spiritual beauty of your wife, and make sure she knows it!

He feels rejected and therefore unloved.

Funny, it was a video series by ANDY Stanley early in our marriage that taught my husband and I that it is ok to have desires in marriage, but NOT to have expectations.

In general, men who respect their wives' opinions have much happier marriages.

She needs it, and she will love it once she sees it. If you can hit all five of these, I can virtually guarantee you that your marriage will improve. And check out 9 Thoughts That Can Change Your Marriage--my book that covers emotional maturity.

Many kids grow up without any father at all. There is no substance or meaning in that. Braithwaite SR, Selby EA, Fincham FD. (It took a while to adjust).

3 Things You Should Expect from Your Spouse →, EMOTIONAL MATURITY SERIES: What To Do When Your Spouse is Stonewalling →, Do We Use God Language to Enable Emotional Immaturity?

Its not the same type of “need” as affection, emotional connection (which btw are the very reasons why we get married in the first place).

Happy marriages require selflessness.

In almost all of the separations, affairs and divorces I’ve seen in my years running Husband Help Haven, at least one of these 9 'things' is missing from the marriage.

Instead, my expectation has evolved to “it will happen, but not necessarily when I might wish”. →. Desired change in couples: gender differences and effects on communication. In addition to hearing the words she speaks, it's important to be open to what your partner has to say, even if you don't agree with it. This means the alone time you get with your wife should not be centered only on the bedroom, or talking about family duties. Yes, worm theology, as you so aptly put it, is very dangerous. Even on the times she has driven up to join me, we will spend the weekend sightseeing and exploring, A strong couple doesn’t break up over money, and the commitments and vows of marriage should supersede money problems. I am so glad that my husband and I can discuss anything without becoming angry, because we both value the other and know how to discuss an issue without attacking the other. She gives her husband the strength to succeed, she nurtures her children to stay healthy and do well in their life, and she has the ability to take care of every minute detail at home. You have to make these moments of connection happen by both arranging for them and then following through. VERY TRUE, Brenda! I think every man should read that book!! 4 Things You Must Do If Your Husband Uses Porn, 10 Signs You’re Respecting Your Husband Too Much. (I googled it and it’s not a thing. And ironically that means rocking the boat. You deserve to be treated well. When you're ACTIVE as a father, your wife will find you ATTRACTIVE as a husband. When a husband becomes apathetic and his mindset is not focused on providing that security, she does not feel loved. Your husband is or will be a lucky man to have a wife with such strong commitment to marriage. I really appreciate these blogs on emotional maturity! Remember that no relationship, and especially marriage, can be sustained without forgiveness.. At least not toward your partner. You can create intimacy for your wife through, You can give her that feeling of intimacy by, You can create that feeling of intimacy by, Or, you can create that feeling on a spiritual level… One of the ways my wife and I stay intimate is by. Now, there is an element of truth here. I agree with your points here 100%.

If you want your kids to have a happy, healthy and fulfilling marriage when they grow up, then you MUST take your job as father seriously.

I hope you’ll excuse me. The Podcast: No Wonder Abuse Victims Don’t Speak Up!

He’s never prayed with me before now unless I specifically asked one or two times. Trustworthy: As I shared in Unlocking the Door to Intimacy in Marriage, being trustworthy means you are who you say you are.